Boyfriend still goes on dating website

Well, he was sort of willing to commit: when I later mentioned being dragged along in a long-planned speed-dating outing with a girl friend (not worth the drink specials, believe me), he got really upset at the thought of me making with another guy.

She gently explained that not only did he appear to have recently updated it, he was — when he’d told me he couldn’t IM because it was too busy at the office. I asked her for a link, but quickly discovered I couldn’t view anything but the thumbnail without signing up myself.

So, the next time I saw him, I did the grown-up thing: I asked him why he still had a profile if he loved me and considered me his girlfriend.

did the childish thing and lied: “Oh, I ended up with some six-month free trial thing because they didn’t cancel my account when I asked, but I don’t really use it unless someone emails me, and then I just say I’m seeing someone.” I decided not to argue about it and figured he’d stop, having been caught.

After that conversation, John got a lot more distant: the phone calls became more infrequent, the callbacks nearly non-existent, the IMs trailed off into emails, and he blamed stress at work and with his sick brother.

than an hour after I (mostly) finished filling out my profile, my first email arrived: “Hey. After he asked me out, a friend took me aside and said, “Look, if you’re not looking for anything serious, I totally respect that, but be really up front with John, because he’s clearly looking for a serious relationship and I don’t want to see this blow up in my face.” I took him at his word, especially after John showered me with attention: long IM conversations, late night phone calls, protestations that he missed me when I went out of town for a week shortly after we started dating.

John and I met through mutual friends at his local watering hole. ” I suppose if it had been someone other than the man who’d been calling himself my boyfriend, I would’ve been flattered.It was our second date when he first called me his girlfriend.I cringed a little internally — it seemed rather fast — but told him that if he was really interested in a monogamous, exclusive relationship, I’d be willing to give it a go.He pondered that and said that maybe he’d jumped the gun after all.I only got more confused the next time we met up, when during a long hug he told me that he loved me.